Observations

This disease makes no sense. One minute to the next is often never the same behaviorally, emotionally, and physically. I once heard Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD) described as a home where all the lights, appliances, and devices are on at once. As the disease progresses, the lights and things slowly go out, but never in the same order for those that have it, until there are no more lights or motion.

Lately my husband's decline seems to have gathered steam but there are days where his thinking seems more clear, his behavior more calm. It got me thinking. In a healthy brain that has damage, the cells try to process a path to go around the damage until there is a permanent way to function well, or as well as possible. In dementia, the brain is not healthy. It is shrinking, degenerating, atrophying. The cells are disappearing. As the brain tries to fire, it may encounter that damage and is probably trying to find a path to function. My theory is that on those better or good days, that the brain has managed to find a path. On the bad days, the path is probably met with a dead end or lots of road blocks. (Think of a labyrinth or corn maze where you run into a dead end over and over and give up.) Some days my husband has a sense of humor, some days he is a ball of irritable agitation. This makes sense to me if I think of it in terms of the brain trying to find a path in a dying cell battlefield that is constantly changing.

We met with a new doctor, a NeuroPsychiatrist and the director of the department. She increased the meds that my husband has been taking for behavioral problems, motivation, anger, and they seem to be helping. She seems to be quite knowledgeable about FTD and the type my husband has, bvFTD. While my husband is suspicious of his team of doctors, and still experiences a lot of denial of his condition, I feel that they are very thorough and compassionate. It's so heartbreaking that he has to go through this cruel disease!